because phoning it in is too hard.

This. Today. And yesterday. And tomorrow.

Yep, because when you try to explain why you hit your brother and he pinched you or vice versa with a pigeon on top. Yeah.

I said that I had no idea what they were talking about or why they were fighting so I was going to go get them a bunny with a flapjack. That made Baby shriek in frustration and Mac say "cool." I didn't really, because I wasn't certain that X-Man wouldn't eat both.

So now when children come screaming to me, trying to out yell each other in order to best air their grievences I simply respond "You look like you need a bunny with a pancake on its head." It still just frustrates Baba, because she's not so much the random humor type of person, it cracks Mac up and Baby just shrieks louder "NO YOU NEED TO YELL AT MAC!" She does not handle it well if you retort "oh, so you need two pancakes on its head."

I blame my father. This is totally a chapter out of his parenting manual. Not so long ago, as Baby was wailing because she had to get Mac a glass of water,  I over heard my father ask her "If this is how you react when you have to give your brother a drink, what are you going to do when the house blows up?"

Food for thought.