Thursday, December 11, 2014

7HAnd so life carried on, for more de cades than i would  care to admit. I became a mother and continued on my father's tradition of giving a book every Christmas, along with other wonderful gifts. Our library grew, from the precious books i was gifted with, to i luce the ones I carefully selected for my own kids. Everything was right in ghd the world. But life is what it is, and we were faced with that which we try so hard to avoid, our mortality. 

No matter how old you are, there's never a good time to consider youf parents leaving this world. And early last year, we learned that the most optimistic prognosis for my father gave him just a decade. There were a lot of scientific words involved,  but the dumbed down for my benefit version was his heart was bad. Most likely a congenital issue, which, because of his relative youth, had caused severe damage to his heart before doctors had determined the source of his decling health.

So there it was, the reality that we aren't meant for this world.  That we will have to say goodbye at some point. And I will never be ready to.

It wasn't devestating though. The good news was my father married my mother, which workiing pretty well for me for quite a while now. Mom is nothing if not precise and contientious. Just the person you want balancing a strict diet and medication regemine. And so they took on this next phase of life.  With success. A few months in, Dad was kicked out of the advanced heart failure team that had been caring for hiim. He was too physically capable to be considered jn advanced heart failure.  His health actually improved as he was finally  treated for what ailed him.

So of course, my father, being the fellow he is, decided he would take his fragile heart and his delicate diet to Mexico. It wasn't a frivolous trip. Dad is a Third Order Dominican and is involved in the international Third Order community.  They were meeting  in Mexico City and he was determined to participate.  Mom and I were less than enthusiastic. We were both worried, he was still ill, although improving, his health was, and will always be, a concern.  But there was no talking uim out of the trip.  Even when I threatened, shoudl the worst happen, to bury him in a Sombrero escorted to thr afterlife by the sounds of a mariachi band. But he woulc not be dissuaded.  He would go. And he would visit the Lady of Guadelupe. 

So he did. It was a long week, filled with worry for those of us still at home. But he spent the feast of the Assumption there in the basillica. With The Lady.

When he returned,  there was a difference.  My father has always been a content and peaceful man. But he was more peaceful, more joyful. 

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

There was a time when X-Man ate whatever was put in front of him. And asked for more. This is not that time. He carefully picked all the vegetables out of his soup and piled them on the table. I instructed him to not do that. He carefully picked them up and dumped them in Mac’s bowl.  Looking back the whole incident, clearly Cinco rubbing the garlic bread in her hair shouldn’t have been my priority. Even though I don’t know how I’m going to wash her hair, as she’s still scared of water. 

Except when I’m taking a shower, then she’s convinced she should get in with me. Until I actually let her in…..them defcon hysteria.

X-Man’s finicky eating is still very toddler-esque. He won’t eat any dinner placed in front of him. He will eat dinner if he is sitting in my lap and eating off my plate. The father figure frowns on this greatly. As I should, but half the time I’m just happy he’s eating. Not that my fifty pound three year old is undernourished at all.

I should encourage the lack of eating in order to curb the boy’s energy. He’s upped the busyness to match the excitement of the season. He’s convinced that I’m holding out on him and that there really are bouncy balls hanging on the Christmas tree. He’ll find them if he has to test every. single. one.  Meanwhile Cinco is convinced that the snowflake ornaments are really cookies. She thinks she’s sly. The glitter on her lips betrays her.

I’d keep writing by X-Man just crawled into my lap, gave me a kiss and ran off. Which means he just did something very naughty. And messy.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

It’s never good when your just turned seven year old leans out the car door and bellows “MOM!!!! Do we have any wipes????” It’s especially not good when you are trying to get updated by the soccer coach and you left X-Man and a full cup of coffee in the car.

And now I have to shampoo the carpet in my car.

The father figure recently started eating his vegetables, even when we weren’t eating a family dinner. He will grudgingly choke them down if the kids are watching, but he never freely eats them. So I was surprised, and touched to see him eating not just broccoli but also squash. I understood. He has another birthday coming, and, soon, will be entering into a new decade. He needs to take care of himself. He’s worked hard and we are planning for the future. He needs to eat healthy if he wants to enjoy those golden years with me.

I stared at him, dreamily, envision the upcoming years when my coffee won’t be dumped all over my car. He smiled back, holding a large scoop of squash on his spoon. “Gotta start eating better.

Yes, yes of course you do dear.

My twenty year high school reunion is coming up.


Which just reminded me that I will have to attend his high school reunion next year. I grabbed a spoon and started eating squash with him. I’ve got five of stud muffin over there’s kids to work off.