Monday, November 24, 2014

I've clawed my way out of the avalanche of life that has buried me. It's still there, but my fingers are free enough to type. And I am certain that you all are breathlessly awaiting updates on my life.

X-Man picks his nose with his tongue. There. I've said it. Before my life was graced by this boy, I was under the impression this was a strictly bovine feat. It's not. Having raised multiple toddlers, I've got it down when it comes to keeping little fingers out of noses. I don't know how to keep a tongue out of a nose. It's not something I've ever really thought about before. I mean, it's one thing to hold hands, but grab his tongue. But that seems less gross than him sticking his tongue up his nose.

Seriously! How's this even an issue in my life? Who ever brainstorms how to keep their kid's tongue out of his nose? There are no Pintrest tips on this.

X-Man has reached a tentative understanding with me. He will wear a shirt and underwear. Or he will wear pants and underwear. He will not wear pants underwear AND a shirt. I've accepted these terms. and the resulting embarrassment has diminished. Our understanding is so great that he will even bring me his underwear after using the potty. Great strides people, great strides.

As much as I would like to be able to say that it is some great filial piety that inspires X-Man to gird his's not. He discovered that sliding down the carpeted stairs sans undies is not comfortable. After a few bumps and bellowed "OUCHES!!!!" on each step, he settled for underpants. But no pants. Allowing his style to be only slightly cramped.

And those of us living with X-Man breathed a great sigh of relief.  Especially as his desire to snuggle with everyone has not diminished. And his love of headstands has grown exponentially.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Life is very busy, which mean little time for blogging. That’s not to say there aren’t all sorts of interesting life lessons being learned. And new experiences. Like croup. X-Man has croup, which is a new experience. X-Man with croup is very cranky. Which keeps me on my toes. But he’s so cute when hoarse.

My sister was part of these life lessons. We were visiting and I thought coffee would be a nice touch to the afternoon. So we moved to the kitchen where I turned on my single serving coffee maker. While we waited for it to heat up, I did a load of laundry because well, you don’t want to waste daylight. And then I moved back to the living room. My sister said “are we going to have coffee?” 

Oh yeah, that’s right.

We made coffee, gussied it up with corn syrup enriched creamers and returned to conversation. Or at least tried to. After thirty minutes of sitting quietly in another room watching a movie, the moment I sat down with my hot cup, the bat signal was lit and here came Cinco and X-Man. Not content to simply observe me attempting to enjoy the moment, they felt the overwhelming need to climb all over me. As much as I want to be there for my children, I wasn’t particularly in the mood to have them stand on my shoulders in that moment. Or sit on my head. It’s a natural result of two children fighting over you, they will try to up each other, climbing higher than the other.

Cinco won that particular battle, and X-Man found entertainment elsewhere. He bonded with my coffee. It became “my tawfy.” He hovered over the cup, talking to it. I think he was studying his reflection in the coffee. When I would sneak a sip, he would observe the diminished amount and whimper to himself “my tawfy….my tawfy.” And howl in protest every time I lifted the cup. He certainly didn’t try to drink it “my tawfy hawt” but he didn’t want me to partake either.He just hovered over it, cradling it in his hands, muttering to it quietly. 

I get loving coffee, but X-Man took it to a new level.

I’ve also learned that in the amount of time it takes to pull X-Man’s pants up and help him wash his hands in a public restroom, Cinco can empty the contents of my purse into the toilet. Again, a new experience. Life, it’s not dull.